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[Please do not fold, spindle, or mutilate. Thank you. Shatterpath]
Category: episode addition, drabble
Date: 11 May 2004
Summary: Alex's thoughts in the aftermath of “Loss.”
Archive: ShatterStorm Productions… anyone else has to ask first
Author's Notes: Finally saw “Loss,” and I must say that it nearly tore me up to see it...and I knew what was coming! And then I suddenly had an Alex muse and this came out in a matter of moments…
I still can't believe it.
I wish I could have told them. Told her.
I have never felt as horrid as when she fought to keep me alive. I could hear the pain in her voice, the fear…the loss.
And I could do nothing. Just lay there as if dead, and all the while dying inside for hurting her.
I had to see her before I left, wouldn't take no for an answer until Hammond finally relented.
The tears in her eyes when she saw me…
I should've listened to Hammond. I think I hurt her more this way.